Sheryl Sandberg, the Chief Operations Officer at Facebook ended sheloshim for her beloved husband, David Goldberg with an emotional 1700-word post on Facebook.
Sheryl Sandberg and David Goldberg were one of the most beloved couples, albeit not as known as others in public life. Their love and their marriage represented an aspiration to many and was hailed by many others as the perfect two-career beautiful and functional marriage.
Sadly, it all came to an end when one month ago, David Goldberg, the Chief Executive of Survey Monkey and beloved father of two passed suddenly and too soon due to a head trauma.
While on a much awaited vacation in Mexico, David, aged 47, fell off a treadmill and that marked his sudden passing. His wounds were fatal and while ambulance rushed him to emergency, there was nothing they could do to save David’s life.
The sudden disappearance left David’s family, both Sheryl and their two children grieving, in anger and overseeing an ever-expanding void.
Sheryl Sandberg now completed the thirty day period of mourning for a spouse known as sheloshim in Judaism. And she completed gracefully. Her post on facebook went viral and speaks to millions who felt this void at any time in life.
While acknowledging that she will never be able to feel true, fulfilling and utter joy again, the period of mourning and self-introspection led Sheryl to acknowledge at the same time the need to be and feel alive.
Endearing references to their children, family and friends make this point as clear as possible for anyone who wants to understand it. Enlightenment followed the period of utter despair and grief that Sheryl experienced during sheloshim.
“These past thirty days, I have spent many of my moments lost in that void…I have lived thirty years in these thirty days. I am thirty years sadder. I feel like I am thirty years wiser.”
Sheryl Sandberg returned to work at the end of the previous month. The process of going back was both a relief, a good opportunity to make the young COO feel that she is needed and feel connected.
Yet, there were moments when that opportunity proved a challenge too. Wandering and lowered eyes had to be met and asked to not shy away in the face of death and trauma so that everything can be put out there and connection can be connection again.
All this Sheryl describes gracefully and pensively in her post. As well as she describes the moment when David Goldberg became her option A, remained her option A and will forever be her option A. In being the love of her life, her husband and the father of her two children. Yet, it is time to consider a plan B too. Delve into life and acknowledge the void as well.
“Dave, to honour your memory and raise your children as they deserve to be raised, I promise to do all I can to kick the sh– out of option B. And even though sheloshim has ended, I still mourn for option A. I will always mourn for option A. As Bono sang, “There is no end to grief . . . and there is no end to love.” I love you, Dave.”
Image Source: Slate